


by your spirit we are bold

by theomegapoint



Series: Kinktober 2018 [14]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Fix-It of Sorts, IT'S THE ONLY CONSISTENT RELATIONSHIP VOLTRON HAS MANAGED, Kinktober 2018, M/M, Memory Loss, Tentacle Dick, What's The Point Of Making Shiro Gay If You're Not Gonna Make Sheith Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-14
Updated: 2018-10-14
Packaged: 2019-08-03 11:42:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,232
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16325552
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theomegapoint/pseuds/theomegapoint
Summary: “Keith.”It's a relief to be able to say Keith's name. To know that the brief moment where he thought he'd lost Keith was nothing more than that: a moment. Of course, Keith still needs to rest, but he's out of the hospital and it's been torture to not be allowed to see him because . . . Well, maybe that's really where they should start. Maybe they should start with acknowledging what's happened between them—the lengths that Keith has gone to for Shiro, and the lengths that Shiro will go to for Keith.





	by your spirit we are bold

“Keith.”

It's a relief to be able to say Keith's name. To know that the brief moment where he thought he'd lost Keith was nothing more than that: a moment. Of course, Keith still needs to rest, but he's out of the hospital and it's been torture to not be allowed to see him because . . . Well, maybe that's really where they should start. Maybe they should start with acknowledging what's happened between them—the lengths that Keith has gone to for Shiro, and the lengths that Shiro will go to for Keith.

“It's good to see you.”

Or maybe not.

The words well up in Shiro's throat and he can't get them out past the knowledge that—it shouldn't feel wrong, maybe, to move on. Realistically, he shouldn't feel guilty about Adam. About knowing that they'd never get a chance to make up. Yet, there's a blockade keeping him from saying anything of the things he'd like to because if he says them then they'll become real. They might hurt Keith in the same way they hurt Adam.

“It's good to see you too.” Keith steps into Shiro's personal space and wraps his arms around Shiro. It's gentle and soft in a way that's almost startling—every time they've hugged recently has been out of desperation. This is like coming home. “We made it.”

“We did.”

Shiro hugs back, trying not to cling so tightly to Keith. He doesn't want to betray how much of a toll that final battle took on him. Doesn't want to betray how much he'd felt unmoored at the possibility of losing Keith, even temporarily.

“I heard about Adam,” Keith says into Shiro's shoulder. “I'm sorry—I know how much he meant to you.”

“It's ancient history,” Shiro says. He's surprised to find that he means it—it was almost a lifetime ago, and for as much guilt as he feels, he hasn't been able to bring himself to cry about Adam yet. “He wasn't the only loss, and he'd be more upset if I couldn't move on. If his sacrifice was in vain.”

Keith pulls away to look up at Shiro, concern written all over his face.

“You don't have to be leader with me, Shiro. We've been through too much for that.”

“I ...” Shiro trails off, unsure what to say. It's true—of the Paladins, it's Keith that Shiro knows the best. “I don't know what to feel about it yet. None of this seems real.”

Anyone else would try to give him advice, maybe. Keith doesn't, which is something that Shiro's always admired about him. He simply hugs Shiro tighter and exudes calm.

It helps more than Shiro ever wants to admit.

\----

“—and we'll need to focus our efforts here, on rebuilding and creating a marketplace. It'll help boost moral and maybe help foster connections between people of different planets.”

Even though he's been putting on his leader persona for this meeting, Shiro is bone-tired and glad for when it ends. He slumps in his chair, face in hands, and just breathes for an uncountable numbers of seconds before he feels a hand on his shoulder. It squeezes gently, and Shiro gathers up enough energy to look whoever it is in the face.

It's Keith, of course. Throughout their restoration efforts, Keith's been something like a rock. Krolia and Kolivan left shortly after Keith recovered to return to their work of restarted the Blade of Marmora. Keith had tried to go with them, but they told him in no uncertain terms that his place was here, being a Paladin and a symbol for hope. Privately, Shiro was glad or that. He's not sure if he could have gotten through this without Keith.

“You ok?”

“Just tired.” Shiro tries for a smile and can see it doesn't quite land by the way Keith's brow subtly furrows. “Seriously, I'll be fine.”

“Shiro,” Keith says. It's sharp, the pure Alpha tone that Keith only ever uses on the Paladins. “You don't have to hold the entire world on your shoulders. “I'm telling Coran to clear your schedule for the next three days.”

“Keith, come on.” Shiro can't quite suppress the whining tone in his voice. It's ridiculous. He doesn't need a break. He doesn't. “I'm just a little tired.”

“You're exhausted, and you need to take it easy.” Keith's tone is steely and hard in a way that makes Shiro suppress the urge to shiver. It brooks no argument, and Shiro knows better than anybody that when Keith sounds like that, it's best to obey. “I'm taking you back to your barrack.”

Shiro protests weakly, but allows Keith to walk him back to his barrack, allows him to fuss and adjust the blankets until he's satisfied. It's selfish, maybe, the way Shiro lets Keith tuck him into his nest. He figures that if Keith feels he needs to rest so badly, he's earned one selfish thing.

\----

“So,” Pidge says as they're walking to get dinner with the rest of the Holts, “are you and Keith, like. Together-together now? Should I tell mom to set another place at dinner?”

“What?” Shiro stops, staring at Pidge. “What makes you say that?”

Pidge looks at him with an expression that very clearly says _are you fucking kidding me right now_ , and Shiro doesn't know what he's done to deserve it. He and Keith aren't. They're not. It's nothing.

“Shiro,” Pidge says, in a tone that's usually reserved for explaining things to idiots, “you _reek_ of Keith. You smell so much like you belong to Keith that even literal children think you're married. It's not subtle. Should I ask mom to set another place at dinner, or is this some weird Galra custom where Keith's not allowed to come to dinner for a certain period of time before you guys get actually married? Allura said that's what Alteans do.”

He doesn't actually make the conscious decision to sit down. It's just that one minute he's standing, and the next he's sitting on the floor of the hallway in a daze because nothing Pidge said makes sense. Sure, Shiro and Keith scent each other, but Shiro scents Pidge and Matt too. He scents Hunk and Lance, when he sees them. It's just. It's just a friendly thing. Smelling like Keith doesn't mean anything? They're certainly not _together_.

Pidge just stands there, visibly distressed. Normally, Shiro would try to pull it together enough to comfort Pidge, but his brain is an endless loop of freaking out about this newfound information.

“Ohhhhhh my god. Okay, uh. I'm not really the best person to be dealing with whatever breakdown you're having right now.” Pidge has always been incredibly uninterested in the workings of people, and Shiro feels kind of bad that this is who he's having this moment in front of. “We both know that, so like. Don't take this the wrong way, but if you didn't know that you and Keith have been dating, you're an idiot and you should probably stop letting him touch your nest.”

“Oh.”

Shiro doesn't even know what to say besides that.

\----

“Shiro!” Keith's voice is bright, and Shiro finds himself automatically turning toward it. “Got a minute?”

“For you? Always.” Shiro tries to tamp down the panic rising in his chest. He doesn't know what he should say to Keith now that Pidge has told him that they—that Keith must like him back. “What's up?”

“Do you want to go grab dinner later? We just got some weird new alien fruit in the market and I thought it would be fun to go try it.”

“Like a date?”

It's out of Shiro's mouth before he can think better of it. Keith's head tips to the side, confusion written all over his face.

“Yes? Why wouldn't it be? We're dating.”

“... Pidge was right.”

“About what? What does Pidge have to do with us dating? We've been together for like three years, Shiro.”

“ _What?_ ” When he'd spoken to Pidge, he'd thought this had been a new development. Like, since they'd returned to Earth new. “We—I'm sorry, _what?_ ”

“When you left for Kerberos,” Keith says slowly, “I kissed you, remember? And you said that Adam was too fresh and it would be a disservice to me to date so soon, but when you came back we could—and then you came back. And you kissed me and said I was one of the only things to keep you sane when you were captured. And then—”

Keith swallows, voice thick with emotion. Shiro automatically reaches out, petting Keith's hair and pulling him close. Trying to exude calm in the same way Keith did for him.

“... you were gone,” Keith says. It's quiet, brittle in a way that Shiro doesn't associate with Keith. “I looked _everywhere_ , and then you came back to me again. And for a while, I was so happy I didn't notice it wasn't really you. I just … I would do _anything_ to keep you with me. And I did. And this time, I just figured you needed to adjust to your new body, then everything with coming to Earth happened and then we found out about Adam—I didn't realize you … You let me arrange your nest, I thought we were finally getting back to normal.”

“I'm—I don't remember any of that, I'm sorry. My mind must remember what my memory doesn't, though, because I—I've never stopped loving you.”

Keith laughs, a little wet. “You told me once that even if you remembered nothing else, you would remember loving me. I guess you were right.”

\----

They don't go to the market. In fact, once they're in Shiro's barracks, they don't go anywhere at all for several days.

The time is mostly spent with Keith reiterating important moments in their relationship. The more Keith says, the more Shiro begins to remember. He doesn't remember it all perfectly, much like he doesn't remember a lot of things perfectly—something about the transfer messed with memories in ways Shiro really hasn't had time to examine. Hasn't really had time to process, until now. They also spend time relearning each other, though.

Shiro learns that Keith likes to be kissed softly, to be held gently, and it's unexpected. It makes sense once Shiro thinks it through—there's something in Keith that's never been treated gently and it's a very human thing to crave. There's a very human nature to Keith, but it's hard to forget that he's not quite human.

It's not a _shock_ when Shiro first sees Keith naked—that he can remember, anyways—but he does need a moment to process what he's seeing. There's, uh. There is definitely no mistaking what's between Keith's legs for human anatomy, which kind of begs the question of how Keith spent so long not knowing he was half-Galra. It seems like an insensitive thing to ask, though, so Shiro doesn't. Instead, he tentatively wraps a hand around it and gasps in surprise when it separates and wraps around his wrist in return. Keith is covering his face, and Shiro gently tugs his arm away.

“Hey,” he says, “Tell me what you like.”

“I, uh.” Keith is blushing, and it's a good look on him in Shiro's opinion. “I don't know? I don't really.”

“I thought you said we'd done this before.” Shiro narrows his eyes at Keith, who's looking to the side awkwardly. “Just tell me what happened last time.”

“You were in heat,” Keith mumbles, “I don't really remember? What we did?”

Shiro laughs, burying his face in the curve of Keith's neck. At least that makes two of them who don't remember.

\----

It's easy, once Shiro is used to it.

Well, maybe easy is the wrong word for it. It's adaptable, is what he should say. He learns that you can't give a Galran a blowjob unless you don't mind curious appendages creeping down your throat. He learns that Keith can't quite control it, that it just reacts to stimulus. He learns that there's two ways to make a Galran Alpha come, and if it gets it right, Keith is _wrecked_.

He learns that he's ruined for human anatomy now, after Keith fucks him the first time. Which is good, because he also learns that Galrans mate for life. That's the sheepish explanation Keith gives for why he'd spent so much time looking for Shiro, even though everyone else had already given up. It's sweet, Shiro thinks.

It's sweet, but incongruent with the way Keith fucks him. The way that Keith's anatomy _shifts_ and _moves_ and knows just where to press to make Shiro a shivering, incoherent mess who just sobs until Keith gives him what he wants. It never takes long, but sometimes Shiro thinks that Keith is lying about how much control he has just so he can continually surprise Shiro.

Not that he's complaining—it's absolutely _glorious_ in ways that Shiro couldn't have even imagined—but it means that it's difficult to clear time for a proper tryst. Usually, they end up with Keith eating Shiro out and Shiro returning the favor but _oh_. Every time they're able to clear out a few hours uninterrupted is something that Shiro craves.

Then again, every moment he spends with Keith is a chance to make a new memory—one that he'll actually remember _clearly_ —and that's enough.

**Author's Note:**

> I did not anticipate how angry I was going to be about Voltron when I wrote this, so it's unfortunately light on the actual kink it's supposed to be. It's done though, and that's all I care about.


End file.
